midnightpoet

solo, "Going Back" was great, and I love you you continued it with "but not so much..." what will happen to her now? I'm intrigued...

Five, I gotta say, I absolutely love the way you write conversations!

five

Thanks. One more.

Title: Is Isn't A Word There

“You don’t speak the same language.” Gloria told Anne.

Sitting on the other side of the checkered table, Ivan stared at the menu, puzzled.

“Strawberry, Blueberry or Blackberry jam?” the waitress asked, tapping her foot. “I don’t have all day.”

“Strawberry,” Anne said, pulling the menu from him and shoving it at the waitress. “No tip for rudeness.” Anne smiled at Ivan. He was handsome. The waitress sneered and walked away.

Anne turned to Gloria. “Berry’s berry. Trying to understand his English is like being lost in a fever.” She sighed, smiling again at Ivan. He grinned and nodded.

“Izvi`nite.” Ivan stood and headed toward the bathrooms.

“I don’t want to tinker and mess up what we have.”

“By actually communicating?”

“He tolerates my quirks and doesn’t expect me to set aside a place for his toothbrush.”

“Serendipity. Love beats all.”

“Don’t be snide. I don’t need him to understand everything. The Russian alphabet isn’t A to Z. Is isn’t a word over there.”

“Where’d you pick of that nugget of bull?”

ZeroMerc

so the goal here is to create a story using the words listed and keep it under the word cap?

solosater

Yep, have fun!!!

Dragon

Not just keep it under the word limit, it has to be exactly that number of words, no more, no less. And if you change the word (ei: change Quirk to Quirky) you have to reduce the word count by 3 for every word you change.

Well here's my latest. 169 not including the title. (I changed strawberry and took some liberties with Toothbrush) Alphabet was definitely the most dificult word to get into this one.

Mortality

He called it serendipitous, a woman who wanted to die meeting a man who never would. I thought it was more irony than serendipity, but it was his quirk to use words improperly and I was beyond caring back then. Before I let him tinker with my mortality.

I remember feeling his tooth brush ever so gently against my jugular, feeling the fever rushing through my veins. I remember tasting him and thinking he was like strawberries, though I couldn’t later say why. I remember waking, wanting nothing so much as some Alphabet Soup and him laughing, saying I’d never really eat food again. I remember wishing I had that little nugget of information before letting him drink so deeply of me. Perhaps I would have thought twice about his rather outlandish proposal, about his promise to cure me or all my numerous ills and more numerous woes. But then, I’d never actually thought he was for real, had I? And he lied anyway, immortality cures no ones woes.

midnightpoet

That last line 'immortality cures no ones woes' is wonderful. I mean, the whole thing is wonderful, but that last line really got me.

Dragon

I'm very much enjoying all of these, but I especially liked five's Message. It told so much while saying so little.

Dragon

Thanks, midnightpoet. That line almost didn't happen at all. I wanted to end it on 'But then, I’d never actually thought he was for real, had I?' but I was short of words. That's one of the things I like about the word count, it forces you to do things you wouldn't have and to think around corners. Whenever I have to adjust for that it almost always improves my story.

midnightpoet

"Is Isn't a Word There"...makes me think of an episode of Friends where Phoebe dates a man who doesn't speak English. Sorry, I watch too much of that show . Great story, tho.

midnightpoet

I agree about the adjusting to meet the word count generally improving the story. The only time I've not experienced that with ThinkWrite was with "Caught in the Rain"...I'm really unhappy with the final product, and I think it was much better before I cut it to pieces.

Dragon

I liked that story, it kind of poses the question, can you really be in love with someone (or settle for them as the case may be) when you really don't have a clue who they are?
I also quite enjoyed them telling off the rude waitress. I think everyone's had that waitress at least once and I, for one, wish I had the stones to tell them what I really thought about their attitude.

Dragon

I was referring to "Is isn't a word there" but you got in ahead of me there.

Dragon

I did like Caught in the Rain too, it did seem like there was more story to tell, but sometimes that's what I like about these, the ambiguity.

midnightpoet

I like the ambiguity too, but sometimes I really feel like I'm missing something. For instance, and I didn't want to admit this, but I have no idea what's going on in "Message"

midnightpoet

ZeroMerc, if you need more background on the whole ThinkWrite thing, the original thread is:

http://thinkdraw.com/forumPosts.php?topicId=202

Then there's the sequel:

http://thinkdraw.com/forumPosts.php?topicId=260

And the third one:

http://thinkdraw.com/forumPosts.php?topicId=299

And the "open" one:

http://thinkdraw.com/forumPosts.php?topicId=278

Dragon

My take on "Message" was of a woman who lost her boyfriend because of something she did and her friend trying to make her see that he wasn't coming back and it's time to move on.

solosater

I also liked "Is Isn't..." and was lost by "Message" but five surely does dialogue quite well.

solosater

Also sorry I was not clearer with ZeroMerk. Not thinking!!!!

five

You are right, Dragon.

solosater

163 words excluding the title.


The Journal


“Serendipity Pennyroyal is your name. You’re aboard the Gold Nugget en route to San Francisco. It’s 1858, you have about 4 days before you jump again, to where I don’t know.”

The journal was in her handwriting, she could tell by the alphabetical quirks but she had not written this, her name wasn’t Serendipity Pennyroyal.

“No, it’s not a fever and no one has tinkered with your mind; you are a guest (victim?) of the rift.

“Try to enjoy it, it gets easier to adjust and you will see amazing things. Your personal items should transfer with you.” Oh good at least she’d have her toothbrush and the meds.

“I haven’t found a way home and by my count I’ve been at it for 6 months, I don’t know how it works but I’ve gotten notes from others so I’ve started leaving them as well. I hope I’ve helped, Good luck, SP.”

She walked to the mirror, this strawberry blond hair was new…