kmkagle

Ron - Can't unfry the egg! Grandpa might not have wanted to talk about his war stories, at least, that particular one. I'm sure if he would have he would have made it known. Be at peace!

Dragon

Ok this is ridiculously long and I'm not sure I'm terribly happy with it other than the beginning but that's where the words took me.

An Olive Branch

The war was ancient. Ancient as only a war between two immortal races could be. No one, not even the eldest remembered what had begun the war. It had become a matter of old hatreds and vengeance for fallen comrades and if it didn’t end soon it would be the end of both races. And so it came to pass that the leader of the Elder Clan; those who forever aged; called for a meeting with the leader of the Daybreak Tribe, who had eternal youth. In older days when the world was young they would have met on neutral ground, a quiet glen or a torch lit cave, but there was no land that remained neutral now that they lived in the time of humankind. So they met in a boardroom at the top of a glass tower and there was something profoundly right about a meeting in the sky.

Chief Curmudgeon of the Elder Clan had donned his most imposing Armani suit and was irritated to see Chief Whipper-Snapper of the Daybreaks stroll in wearing torn jeans and a filthy “Ramones” t-shirt. Whipper-Snapper flopped into his chair and threw his booted feet onto the table with a thump.

“So old man, what do you want?”

Curmudgeon considered his rival with barely veiled disgust and replied, “In a word, Peace.”

That caught Whipper-Snapper’s attention. “Peace,” he said in disbelief, “I thought all you cantankerous old fools thought we were a bunch of useless jackanapes. Why talk peace now?”

“Don’t squander this opportunity,” Curmudgeon implored, “And don’t ‘Old man’ me, you’re as old as I am you just pretend at youth. Our peoples are dying. This has become a war of attrition and it can’t go on. We can’t keep up a war built on the hate of those long dead. I suggest we call a truce, we won’t trespass against you, you won’t trespass against us.”

Whipper-Snapper sat very still, considering this olive branch. “And what of the humans?”

“What of them? They breed like rats, they’ll go on no matter what happens to us. They haven’t been under our control for centuries now.”

“And I thought Elders were all Human Lovers,” the youthful chief snorted, “So be it, a truce between our people. And may I suggest a general ban on our two races consorting with one another?”

“Agreed, I’ve never thought bringing humans into existence was a good idea. Best we don’t add to their population any more. Perhaps I was wrong about you Daybreaks, you seem to be on the same page as us afterall.”

midnightpoet

Way over the word count, but everyone else's is, so why not? Most of my stories are inspired solely by the word list, but this one came from a song that for some reason has been stuck in my head all day.

"She only smokes when she drinks"

I sat alone at the bar. In front of me was strong fruity drink that I had been nursing for the last half hour.

The bar wasn’t crowded, but there were enough people there that the buzz of voices carried over the thump of the music. I watched two young girls fall all over each other on what passed for a dance floor in a place like this. One or the other of them had probably just turn of age to be here, and they had come out to squander the birthday money.

I sat there and watched people, thinking about them instead of ruminating on my problems. The regulars at this bar knew better than to disturb me in my thoughtful state, but I implored whatever higher powers are out there not to let a stranger come and trespass on me and my time with my drink.

The drunk girls stopped holding my attention quickly, and my mind went to men, as it always does when I sit here. No, I wasn’t trying to pick one up; I was trying to forget about them in general.

This last one, Glen, had been quite the jackanapes when I met him, and the young whipper-snapper (he was four years my junior) had made me feel free and alive. After a while, I realized he was nothing but a cantankerous curmudgeon, and his conceit and presumption that had once been cute wore on my nerves.

He was a man who offered everything at the beginning and delivered nothing, and I am so tired of being let down by men.

I dug a cigarette out of my purse. I kept a pack in there, but I only smoked on nights like this, sitting at a bar, sipping something feminine.

I was digging for a lighter when a good-looking gentleman next to me pulled one out. I allowed him to light my cigarette, with a murmured thanks, and turned away, hoping he’d get the hint that I’m not that kind of girl.

kmkagle

Good story! Smart girl! She took the flint out of his lighter, didn't she?

BTW - how long does this challenge last? I meant to ask.

midnightpoet

generally a week

Doug

Dragon: Liked the story other than a few "punctuation" problems. Sounds a little like the Planet of the Apes story line. I think KM should have limited the word count as i believed the premise was using a "word list" in a "short" story adding some literary limitations to create a "masterpiece". I thought it was the best story so far along with Ron's futuristic "funny" on thinkdraw threads.

anotherronism

KM: Just a reminder.

Since you're the torch bearer you must select the next one. It's become a custom that this is done sometime on Tuesday. It's now Thursday...

Just a reminder...

kmkagle

Sorry about that! Actually, believe it or not, I was just going in to do that! Honest!!!!!

kmkagle

This is a difficult choice. All of the stories were sooo good. I have to pass this "torch" to charity! If you (charity) cannot accept please let me know this a.m. (7/16/09). I thin old Ron is just itching to get his hands on this torch so he can "torture" us with 285 or, whatever!

BTW Ron - I wasn't upset with midnightpoet for critiquing. What made you think that? This is a lighthearted question, no hostility involved!

anotherronism

KM: It's not you. Not at all.

I've been begging for criticism in this forum and also begging for new contributors or the return of past contributors. So I kind of feel it's my duty to lessen the blow to someone who returns and actually gets the criticism I've been asking for.

It's just like that. Actually - it's exactly like that.

But also - again - I apologize to everyone. I've been begging for participation and I've checked in like three times in nine days.

This is a hard thing to do at any time. But it seems especially hard in the summer. There are just so many distractions out there.

My Innerspace is so spoiled right now.

Although I do have a story idea. I can't wait for the word-list. There is no funner thing than taking a pre-existing story idea and molding it to fit an unseen-word-list.

My idea is for the first woman cow-killer in the US. (I know - sounds strange. But I'm actually excited about it. It is SO wide open. Do a little research - it won't take you long. This sounds morbid but the position actually exists and has been considered important at various times. There's a subtext to killing cows. Sometimes it just don't matter - kill that damned cow - I need me a pattie. But other times - it's been gentle and humane - like now. But there was a woman - somewhere, some time - who was the first cow-killer.

Charity - give me a good word list and please drop the word count and please put back the iron-clad rules.

This thing has gotten so messy as to resemble a baby's diaper. Bring it back in. Reign it back. Puh-lease.

Ron

anotherronism

Who was the first "female" cow-killer that is...

kmkagle

Ron - There's a female cow killer ant. Hm! They blame us for everything.

midnightpoet

Charity?! Where are you?!

kmkagle

Charityb98, where are you?????

kmkagle

Charity, I will hold this until 12:00 A.M. 7/18/09.

kmkagle

Charity, I'm so sorry, we called and nobody answered. Mr. Ron has been, itching and twitching to get his hands on this thread.

Mr. Ron, it's all yours! Be kind!

kmkagle

Also, Ron, you have until 12:00 P.M., Monday, 07/20/09 to notify. Otherwise, I will again, name another successor. Thanks.

Robindcr8l

OK, I have just not had the time to delve into short-story reading lately, and was gone for a spell also. So imagine my surprise when I started browsing through this and read Ron's futuristic piece only to find out we'd been MARRIED at some point for 3 years! Ron, I'm not sure which 3 years they were (or will be, i guess), but fyi: I prefer a modest diamond in a round or princess setting. I can't have anything that will catch on my latex gloves at work, so keep that in mind when selecting the ring! LMAO

Login

Ha,ha,ha,ha, ... Robindcr8l, I love your sense of humour.

kmkagle

Robin - Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! He's probably out buying truckloads of crackerjacks so he can find a ring inside!